When I started writing  A Letter to Fathers Considering Suicide in the Digital Age, I knew that there was not good day for a father to commit suicide. I quickly realized that there is not a good day to discuss suicide. I eventually published on my mother and step-father’s 25th wedding anniversary. I could have waited another day, but there is not a good day. Besides, I love my mom and my step-father, and every other day is horrible. Yesterday was the birthday of one of my father figures who I talk to regularly, including every Father’s Day. I could have posted on the 22nd, but 22 reminds me of Taylor Swift (which reminds me of my daughter), and I did not want to ruin any more music. I could have written on the 20th, but there was an event honoring my father’s good friend. I could have posted on Mother’s Day, or my birthday, or my son’s birthday… I could have written on Sunday, but who wants to ruin Sundays?… Read the rest

- Neil Gaiman, University of the Arts 2012 Commencement Address

I may not make good art now, but I am definitely walking in the middle of the street exposed. Many of my friends and colleagues have watched me recently and been unable to recognize me. I have wondered too. I have heard the whispers behind my back… even when I am alone. What has happened to Bryan? Granted, he is usually a little socially awkward, but has he lost it? Well, yes. I had.

And I did not know how TO FIND IT. On Sunday while wandering through a bookstore, I found Neil Gaiman’s book about Making Good Art.… Read the rest

I had already decided to write about poetry for this blog post when I heard the Elvis Costello version of Peace, Love and Understanding and decided to change direction again. (There is a Nick Lowe version too.) I have finally filled in the third blank but I do not feel that I have solved the puzzle. For the last several weeks, especially since the convention, I have felt like a passenger on a strange Dr. Who adventure bus. My dyslexia is bordering on the psychedelic. I am confusing Abbott & Costello with Elvis Costello and Elvis Presley. I dreaming in neon green and gold about the Queen of California. Where did she go?

Anne Howard inspired me with an article about looking to poets and saints during difficult moments. Anne explained that when the going gets tough, she “count(s) on poetry to tell the truth when prose gets thick and tiresome.… Read the rest

As one of the local committee members who planned the 2013 Spring JEA National Convention, I was busy creating expectations. After the last convention in San Antonio, I even thought that I would influence the story. Wrong. I did not even control my own computer. I barely managed my own emotions. When the convention ended and people said that they had left their heart in San Francisco, I returned three different times searching for some connection to everyone who had left. I have never felt so disoriented after a convention… AND I LIVE HERE!

John Lennon also wrote “Give Peace a Chance.” I was leading a photography workshop down Market Street when this person crossed the street yelling on his megaphone. With his colorful shirt, peace signs, and megaphone, we could make a good photo, but I think he is an example of the first quote more than the second.… Read the rest

Getting closer is a useful skill, and as we “get closer” to the 2013 Spring National High School Journalism Convention, I have been contemplating Capa’s quote and the meaning of “getting closer.” On the first day of the convention, I will teach an all-day photography workshop where we will practice getting closer literally, technically and metaphorically.

Sometimes getting closer is simple and we wait for the subject (or convention) to get closer.  Other times we must adjust. We can change equipment or change our personal perspective. We can research a subject and become closer to the people we photograph. We can invest ourselves. We can also become more vulnerable and admit to our community that we have a disability. (I have had epilepsy since high school, but I did not talk about it until the last few years.)

During the workshop, we will also investigate Robert Capa and his advice.… Read the rest

My blind faith was tested often the last eight days. When I photographed the Epilepsy Foundation of San Diego County fundraiser, I felt disoriented. I was in the valley of the blind… and I was not the person who had one eye. I needed a service dog just as much as anyone else.

On Wednesday, I left Oakland for Washington. Because of the Midwest storm, I barely made my connecting flight.… Read the rest

Every bird needs a little love, whether we have epilepsy and/or broken wings. Vultures, Ravens and Blackbirds need love. Sheryl Crow needs love. Some of us might have the unreasonable demand that the world stop spinning so fast, but I can still pray for love.… Read the rest

Mark and I practice simple complexity, a term my educator step-father referenced during the discussion thread of my Simple Man post.  In our presentation, we simplify many fast moving complex dynamics that we cannot always predict. (Dr. Hannah Fry explains complexity science during a short TEDx video, “Is life really that complex?”)  

How is complexity theory relevant? Well, we still teach students the simple lesson that “First Impressions” influence perceptions; however, photographers cannot control which image is viewed first.… Read the rest

Well, I knew my theme song (or at least I thought I did.) It was Bad Company, by Bad Company. Yeah, this guy with a face of fear “chose a gun and threw away the sun.” It does not make sense. It is a great song, but as far as a “theme song” it falls apart after the first two lines.

Company always on the run/ Destiny is the rising sun… after that, who wants a theme song that announces your bad disposition and willingness to die using firearms?… Read the rest

My son loves animals and habitats. For a first grader, he is either obsessed with living creatures or really smart. He studies animals the way I studied dinosaurs. We argue about whether insects are animals. (He believes that insects are in fact animals.) He has taught me that “water spiders” are actually “water striders,” and that the largest dolphin is… ? Wait for it? Just when you thought nothing was new… the killer whale. (look it up!)

I learn as much during the field trips as the students, and I suspect that the other parents learn too.… Read the rest